MY FRIEND ANDREA IS SUFFERING FROM A RARE AILMENT.

I know a guy who can surgically remove that horrendous third arm growth thingy Andrea's currently suffering from. He's an expert in the field. Does great work. Very little scarring. He's rates are reasonable too. He does operate out of a public storage locker -- but the savings have to come from somewhere, right? It'll be worth it though, just to be able to see again.

SAVE ANDREA FROM PUBLIC STORAGE LOCKER SURGERY AS SEEN ON CSI!

Not everyone knows the pain and social stigmas associated with this lesser know disease Forehead-arm-stuck-itis. I’ve just done some research, and the good news is: There’s hope! The people at the Institute for the Ethical Treatment of Forehead-arm-stuck-itis or Freedom Forehead, as they like to call themselves, know that growing a third arm out of your forehead is no laughing matter. That is why they are committed to detaching the three-million third arms that are currently stuck to people's heads all over the world. In fact in the time it takes you to read this, five more people are now suffering from Forehead-arm-stuck-itis in cases much worse than yours. After all, you're one of the lucky ones. You can still eat and breathe.

Help support this tireless team fighting one of the top global epidemics that has been widely ignored by the media. Once you become aware of the depth of this problem you will be compelled to lend Freedom Forehead a hand, or rather help take one away. Give generously but also pull vigorously, at least until the damn thing comes off.